I should have gone to the Imperial Hotel for a chicken parma.

I was eating early because I was going to the Little Dum Dum Club which began at 6:30 pm.

I was going to go to the Arbory, except the weather was in the process of shifting from muggy to cool with a wind slowly blowing through the city and I was dressed for the latter so I didn’t want to go from where I had parked (Federation Square) down to Flinders Street station (where Arbory is) and then back up to the European Bier Cafe on Exhibition Street where the Little Dum Dum Club would be later in the evening.

I could have eaten at the European Bier Cafe, but I wanted to try somewhere different.
Often, when looking for places to eat in the city I turn to ParmaDaze.com which offers a good, single minded review of all things crumbed chicken-based.
Then in my searching I found Burgers of Melbourne not as detailed as ParmaDaze, but it’s certainly an interesting site if looking for real images of burgers, albeit a bit Instagram-styled images. Their site has a fairly detailed star rating breakdown, and gave The Grand Trailer Park Taverna a good rating.

I went into The Grand Trailer Park Taverna having looked at the menu online and thought that it would be an interesting place to go and try.

The interior was interesting, it’s got a food truck / trailer park sort of hipster aesthetic. Completely built inside with no readily apparent real original elements to it, as it’s on the second level of the building so everything that was within would have had to fit up the stairwell or perhaps through the balcony by crane.
The interior style they had created within was well realised.

I ordered the ‘David Chang’ - “Premium Aussie beef patty, American cheddar cheese, streaky bacon, egg, tomato, butter lettuce, sliced beetroot, special burger sauce & America mustard on a toasted brioche bun” $18.50
Maybe it’s my own fault for ordering something with fairly inconsequential sorts of flavours.
But that said, something like the ‘Mighty Melbourne’ from Grill’d which contains “Grass-fed lean beef, tasty cheese, crispy trim bacon, free range egg, a couple of slices of beetroot with salad, relish & herbed mayo.” manages to make for a fresh tasting and enjoyable burger, for several dollars less than the Grand Taverna.

I ordered beer battered chips with the burger, and a pot of coke. The latter of which was served in a big jar / mug thing.

In short order, possibly 10-15 minutes my burger arrived. I didn’t take a photo of it, and am glad I didn’t because that time taken would have allowed even more of the heat to drift away from it.

The burger and indeed the chips were, optimistically, warm. Near the back of the burger it was slightly warmer than the rest of the burger.

There were no real dominant flavours in the burger. It was warm, filling but it was all a bit...bleh. The mustard and special burger sauce had no real defining flavours to it. The butter lettuce looked like it was regular iceberg lettuce from looking at it before biting into it, and somewhat browned on the end at that.
The most positive thing I could say is that it was filling.

The chips were good, well, good enough. They were well battered, nice flavour, they’d been cooked in clean oil. They were vaguely warm, though retained their crunch even as they shifted towards room temperature.

I’m sure people hipsters and people in their teens and early to mid-20s enjoy this place. Booths, big tables, high stools and benches to sit at. It’s got a retro American aesthetic to it that speaks to a certain style, it’s all very...well designed. Well constructed to a point. It’s the point that kinda got me looking around, knowing that aside from the kitchen the whole space had to have been constructed from scratch, making it a very fake space. Perhaps fake is the wrong word, it’s well ‘designed’ but it’s been quite constructed in order to get there.
Maybe that element doesn’t matter, I’m not sure.

But I think whatever the design aesthetics of the space the food should speak for itself, and, it was rich, but no defining flavours. Soft, but no real contrasting texture. I couldn’t really describe one specific element of the burger except maybe a hint of the American mustard. Not even the beetroot provided much contrast as it like the egg was swamped by the ‘special burger sauce’.